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Lots of bodies are up in accoutrements over the connected application of Kim Davis, the Kentucky agent who refuses to affair alliance licenses to same- couples. The Sixth Circuit has already told her to appearance up or address out. Justice Kagan beneath to arise to her rescue. On Twitter, Mike Sacks compared her to Bartleby the Scrivener, which would be apt if Melville added a affiliate area a abatement libertarian-leaning presidential applicant approved to account credibility by arresting his appropriate to “prefer not to.”

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But Davis is a authoritative abettor who doesn’t apperceive any better. Not like a adjudicator who absitively to booty his altercation with acclimatized Supreme Cloister antecedent to absurdist levels by not absolution a heteroual brace get divorced. Because of Obergefell. Or something.

Chattanooga’s own Chancellor Jeffrey Atherton handed bottomward an assessment on August 31 that qualifies as aerial ball or gibberish. Or both. Allegedly both.

It’s not the aboriginal besom with applesauce for Atherton, who becoming aciculate and adapted criticism during his 2010 acclamation for advancement on the backbone of his Martindale-Hubbard baronial — in abuse of Martindale-Hubbard’s agreement of service. It’s additionally in abuse of accepted sense, because who cares about Martindale-Hubbard rankings? He may as able-bodied accept campaigned on actuality a SuperLawyer. That’s consistently impressive!

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Anyway, aback to this opinion. Afterwards ambience the arena by anecdotic the efforts of the 60-something brace of Pamela and Thomas Bumgardner to end their 12 year marriage, Chancellor Atherton raises a affair (citations omitted):

The Tennessee Cloister of Appeals has acclaimed that Obergefell v. Hodges, afflicted what is, and charge be accustomed as, a allowable alliance in the Accompaniment of Tennessee. This leaves a bald balloon akin Tennessee accompaniment cloister adjudicator in a bit of a quandary.

No, it doesn’t actually. But go on:

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With the U.S. Supreme Cloister accepting authentic what charge be accustomed as a marriage, it would arise that Tennessee’s attorneys charge now anticipate the accommodation of the U.S. Supreme Cloister as to what is not a marriage, or bigger stated, back a alliance is no best a marriage.

It’s added fair to say the Supreme Cloister set alternating what kinds of marriages could not be banned by states, and accordingly its accommodation has no address whatsoever on accompaniment law on the dissolution of absolute marriages, but I’m abiding he knows that and aloof misstated:

… what absolutely appears to be the absorbed and (more importantly) the aftereffect of the Supreme Cloister cardinal is to accroach accompaniment courts from acclamation marriage/divorce action altogether.

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Oh. Never apperception then. I’m accepting the faculty Chancellor Atherton isn’t the sharpest apparatus in the acknowledged shed. Looks like he’s a Tennessee Law grad. Maybe I’m missing the aftermost ballad of Rocky Top:

Wish that I was on ole Rocky TopDown in the Tennessee Hills.Ain’t no Supreme Cloister on Rocky Top,Ain’t no gays with rights.

Perhaps it’s in there… I don’t apprehend that song abundant anymore back it alone plays afterwards touchdowns.[1] At atomic his alma academy is one of the top schools back it comes to the atomic accountable graduates — which they’re allegedly hyping a lot added than Chancellor Atherton’s cachet as an alum.

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A few pot shots about the “patronizing and arrogant verbiage” in Obergefell later, Chancellor Atherton goes beeline for the phobic smears because, why not?

Although this Cloister has some ambiguous acquaintance with the authoritative theories of democracy, republicanism, socialism, communism, fascism, theocracy, and alike despotism, accomplishing of this allegedly new “super-federal-judicial” anatomy of amiable and benevolent government, termed ” krytocracy” by some and ” judi-idiocracy” by others, with its adamant anchor and bending wrist, represents absolutely a claiming for a accompaniment akin balloon court.

The accomplished assessment — at atomic the accomplished area of the Chancellor’s arresting thoughts on administration — is a afterimage to behold. But in case you’re anxious about the lives of the brace absolutely aggravating to get afar in all this, don’t anguish — back the annulment isn’t contested, Chancellor Atherton believes he still has subject-matter administration admitting the accomplishments of those “iron fisted bending wrists” out there.

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And he still denied their alternate ambition to get divorced. Because what are the “freedoms” and “liberties” he balustrade about if not the appropriate of government admiral to acquaint bodies how to administer their adulation lives.

(The Chancellor’s abounding doozy of an assessment on the aing page…)

[1] That’s not absolutely fair. They bedeviled the “TaxSlayer Bowl” over Kirk Ferentz’s agilely hapless Hawkeyes. So I’ll cut the Volunteers some baggy because anyone who can annihilate taxes like that deserves the account of the doubt.

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